A Note For My Girls

Dear L & H

I want you to know this.  At night when you ask me to lay with you I know that I should but in the back of my mind I am thinking about all the things I have to get done in order to spend the next day with you.

I always tell you that I will be back after I get ready for bed and if you are still awake I will lay with you.  That is never a lie.

I come back to your room and inevitably you are always sound asleep.  Sometimes I do crawl in bed with you just to be in a moment of complete calmness; to smell you and hold your hand and listen to your gentle breath.

I wonder what you are dreaming about.  Are you reliving the fun day at the beach?  Are you running from me as I try to beat you for not listening for the 100th time?  Are you smiling at the funny jokes we told?  Whatever it is I pretend I know and in my thoughts you are happy.

Every single night I stare at you for a while.  I stare at the roundness of your checks, the innocence and safety of your age, the redness in your lips.  It sounds creepy but when you are a Mom you will do the same thing and you will remember reading this and think of me.

You will think about how incredibly powerful a love for your child is and how nothing in the world will top these feelings.  I’m overflowing with emotions because in less than a month you will be 4.  We have come so far and done so much but each day you are growing more independent and I hate the thought of when you won’t want to sit on my lap or hold my hand.

That’s all.  I can’t write anymore because my tears won’t stop and I can barely see what I’m putting on paper.  But I do love you and I always come back like I promise I will.  I did last night, I will tonight and I will do it every day of your life.  I love you.  I love you both.

Forever,

Mommy

9 thoughts on “A Note For My Girls

  1. What a beautiful letter Kerry! The tears are flowing! H and L are sooo lucky to have you for a mom! I hope you are able to save this until they are moms and you can share this with them!!!!

  2. Ah… soaking in your beautiful love letter to your precious girls!!!!! Oh how I think they will treasure them as the years go by and they have your words always, and your heart. I am SO glad I stopped by!!!! We are one and the same, my friend!! XO

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