This weeks Monday Listicle is “Oh NO You Didn’t” brought to you by Stasha herself.
I was thinking of making my list all about what people say to either a pregnant woman or a woman pregnant with twins…for the second time.
I probably will one of these days but for now let’s just go with the many things my husband has done in the past. It’s no wonder I dedicated a site to him and him alone; Damn-it Steve is always heard around the world or at least the neighborhood from my loud mouth.
Without further ado, here is my Damn-it Steve-Oh NO You DIDN’T list:
- Taught the girls to sing “Momma’s got a big ol’ butt oh yeah” and they have willingly and clearly sang it at school, in the store, the doctor’s office and more
- Brought to life pantsing in this house. Luckily I’m pregnant and get a short reprieve but the neighbors have probably had their fill of my butt
- Tells the girls when it’s nap time “Girls- nap time or slap time”
- He buries the girls up to their neck in snow and gives them snow boobies
- He told me not to make a certain face because a quarter could get stuck in my wrinkle
- I was trying to sneak out of the house when the girls busted me and asked where I was going. I said to an adult store. In the background Steve yells to them “A nudey bar!”
- He told the girls that gravy is liquid poop
- He high-fived my chest when he didn’t think the girls were looking when we were playing memory. A minute later when H got a match she reached over and high-fived my boobs.
- He let the girls use grapefruits for rolling down pins since we didn’t have any balls
- He not only taught the girls to blow spit bubbles but taught them how to let spit drip out of their mouth and then suck it back up real quick
Let me clarify that just because this is an example of a week in my life with Steve; he is an excellent father and husband. He just likes to annoy me and act like a kid. I, depleted and defeated, asked him one day, “why?” And his only response was, “I know I shouldn’t but I just can’t help it.’
And there you have it.
He does make me laugh and keeps me on my toes until the school starts calling and parents start canceling play dates, then he has to deal with it on his own.
Also don’t for get to enter my lovely GIVEAWAY….The Blooming Bath! How adorable is this????