The best and worst parenting advice. Oh the sweet topic of advice; unwanted advice, loud forceful advice, sweet innocent advice. Sometimes it is so difficult to take advice especially if I didn’t ask for it and It wasn’t what I … Continue reading
Having twins is difficult but not impossible and actually not even that difficult. Having a colicky kid? Now that is near impossible and certainly difficult.
I bring this topic up because we are once again experiencing difficulty with L’s tummy issues. It all started many years ago when the girls were just a few weeks old. L started to fuss in the afternoons which turned into the evenings which turned into the wee hours of the morning.
As you will hear time and again from other mothers, “follow your natural instinct.” You should, always. Our original doctor, God rest his soul, thought she might have acid reflux therefore leading to colic and asked us to track her daily routine. By the time we went back at just a month she was starting her crying fits, not stop crying, around 3 or 4 in the afternoon and would not stop until 1 or 2 in the morning.
I can handle the cry of an infant. It hasn’t developed into those ear piercing sounds that a baby and toddler bring plus I knew she was in pain. The problem was she wanted to be held, in certain positions, and she wanted you standing. That is where the impossible came in. Standing and rocking an infant for an average of 10 hours sucks especially when you have another infant to care for. God love you H for your perfect infant and baby stage!
The new doctor, who is no longer our doctor, suggested that I stop breast feeding and breast milk altogether and give her gas medicine. She didn’t think she had reflux because she wasn’t throwing up. I knew something was wrong and insisted on testing.
The next day we were at the hospital and I was feeding her a bottle of yucky barium. She was starving so she sucked it down. Once on the table, the specialist wanted to see her reflux at least 5 times in the following twenty minutes. That poor girl refluxed over 15 times in the first 5 minutes so they immediately pulled her off the table.
They were actual amazed at how much she refluxed. Her crying was from the constant burning in her throat because she couldn’t get it out. If she would just throw up she would have felt immediate relief and probably slept.
The doctor at the hospital put her on prescription medicine and we saw improvements immediately, not great improvements but she would at least sleep…in a moving swing.
Through many more visits with new doctors and just talking to other mothers we discovered a brilliant hold for her which put pressure on her belly so she would feel no pain and fall asleep. Again with all these visits we came to the conclusion that breast milk, no matter what I cut out of my diet, was just not working for her. So at 6 weeks she was done and on a diet of thick alimentum formula with rice added.
Alimentum worked wonders but it is super expensive. We switched to this when regular even sensitive formulas were not working. We found a site on-line that only cost $20 per can if we bought a case of it but as she grew that can would only last 3-4 days. She got used to formula cold quickly! I told her daycare to NOT heat it up under any circumstances so she could drink anything left over later. Wasting that stuff was not an option.
Anyway, the doctors thought her relief would fully come by 3 months but her colic did not end until almost 6 months. Through this time we found out she was lactose intolerant so most dairy was cut from her diet.
We also learned that certain cheese, like goat and mozzarella, and yogurt, during its process, was stripped or void of lactose so those products seemed fine for her. We eventually started to allow her to have dairy indirectly meaning if it was an ingredient but not the main ingredient so she could have things like goldfish but not straight milk or cheese.
There were many days that it seemed she would have a reaction which would send her either cramping with intense screaming pain or give her horrible diarrhea. There were other days that a similar diet was fine.
After this summer and far too many bouts of pain and suffering for that child we have eliminated dairy altogether.
She has gotten to the point where she will avoid going poop at all costs because she remembers the pain she felt 2 weeks ago after, we are assuming, eating pizza that had mixed cheeses instead of just mozzarella on it.
She screams in pain when she can’t hold it any longer. We know when she has to go because she gets a terror look on her face, she crosses her legs and her body gets stiff as a board. It is horrible. I have put her back in diapers so I can smother her bum in ointments to help ease the pain and TMI but it helps the poop slide out. A few times she didn’t even realize she went.
I discussed with her that she is no longer allowed to have dairy products and it should help her tummy and bummy. She was completely fine with this decision. I listed common things she was not allowed to have and yesterday she recited them to Steve.
No milk, cheese, yogurt, ice cream, yogurt raisins.
Later that evening while we were having dinner, out of the blue she said, “Oh Daddy I forgot to add no gold fish!”
The teacher said she is fine at snack time when the other kids are getting yogurt or goldfish and she has her special stash of raisins and popcorn. It breaks my heart that at 3 she is so responsible and understanding of her situation.
It breaks my heart even more that she would get yelled at for having accidents when we didn’t realize she had no control. One minute she thinks it’s just gas and the next she thinks its a bm and it turns out its neither, both or the opposite of what she thought. A young child should not understand shame or embarrassment like this.
If anyone has any other ideas of what can be causing her so much pain please let me know. I do want to track this for a few weeks before heading back to the doctor and requesting more tests so please toss out any ideas or opinions.
In one of my Mommy groups we created a version of “The Twelve Days of Christmas” that made us all giggle so hard. Since today is the twelfth day I thought what would be a better post than to create the 12 days of Christmas my way. I hope you enjoy! Starting backwards with 12 make sure to get the tune going before you start.
12 months of play dates*
11 cousins playing
10 sticky fingers
9 months of stretch marks
8 hours of pumping*
7 cups of coffee
6 rounds of IUI
5 hours of colic
4 major surgeries
3 hours of sleep
2 happy parents
And a set of babies under the tree
I would love to hear your version!!! Happy Holidays!!
*stolen from MOPS version